Recipes for Living Helen Harsh

At 93 years-of-age Helen is entering a new phase of her life. Due to glaucoma, she had lost the sight of her left eye six or seven years ago, and about four years ago cataracts began clouding the vision in her right eye. It had reached the point at which she couldn't identify visitors or even see the food on her plate. Now she has had the cataracts removed-here in Osceola by Dr. Chris Den Ouden, ophthalmologist, from West Des Moines-and Helen can see! She can recognize persons who come to visit her and is pleased to discover the bright colors in her clothing! She and her daughter Guyla are considering the possibility that she can return to doing handwork, which had been her joy. Guyla remarked that when she gets her glasses she might even be able to crochet more doilies for her.

The one writing this story has a framed cross-stitched saying that was a gift from Helen at the time she was able to attend the King's Daughters' Sunday School Class. It catches up her philosophy of life very well: God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change/ courage to change those things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. An illustration of how she applies this in her life is that, when she realized that it was no longer safe for her to live alone, she announced to the family that she should move from her apartment at 120 West Shaw in Osceola to the Nursing and Rehabilitation Center, formerly Osceola Leisure Manor. She knew it would relieve their minds and she is further doing that by finding living there delightful. "There is something going on every day! We have sing-a-longs when Irene Fuller comes to play for us. I can't sing or haven't been able to read the words, but I enjoy listening. The other day we cooked. We made candy that didn't set up well and we had to eat it with a spoon, but it was good." Such is Helen's attitude toward life.

Helen was born in Milo, Iowa, on December 25, 1905, to Oren and Nellie Winkle. Oren was a farmer and charter member of the Black Angus Association, affirmed by a certificate the family still has. He died in 1914, of tuberculosis and asthma, the latter of which Guyla inherited. Helen's mother remarried Charlie Burt.

Helen had a sister Grace, four years older than she, and a younger brother Henry. But Merle, eight years older than Helen, was an infant when his mother, Helen's grandmother, died and he was raised along with Helen, Grace and Henry. He was like another brother and Helen laughs to remember how they used to go the two miles to the Milo school. Their transportation was a horse and one-seated buggy. Merle drove and he and Grace sat on the seat with Henry and Helen sitting on a box in front of them. Merle would let the others out at school and take the horse to his brother Lon's barn during the day, then go back to hitch it up to go home again.

For a short time the family lived in Truro and moved to New Virginia when Helen was about 12. Of her various teachers, and after all these years, Helen remembers Mae Queen, whom she had in the 4th grade. She recalls no particular incident, just that Miss Queen was a good teacher, very kind and she enjoyed the children.

Helen's mother was widowed twice. Her second husband, whom Guyla called "Charlie", died of a heart attack around 1950. She was left with no money but went on to make a life for herself and the family. She boarded men teachers-wouldn't have the women-and the men "fought" to get to stay there. She set a beautiful table with white tablecloth, lovely china and silverware, every day. Everything that she did, she did nicely. She was a seamstress and sewed for Mrs. Charlotte Beardsley, whose husband, Bill, served as Governor of Iowa. For a time she lived in the governor's mansion and cooked for the Governor and First Lady of Iowa; and in later years she took care of Mrs. Beardsley and of Helen's aunt, her father's sister. What a lady she was! Helen and Guyla speak of her fondly as they remember how beautifully she dressed for church and refused a ride because it would wrinkle the back of her dress before she arrived. She died at the age of 80, in 1969.

Helen went to school only through the 9th grade because she met a handsome young man, Delbert Harsh, whose parents, Jim and Maggie Harsh, farmed in the New Virginia area. Delbert had a sister, Lela. Maggie helped with the family income by raising lots of chickens. For two reasons "Maggie" became Helen's ''Mother Harsh": (1) because in those days young people respectfully addressed their elders by title-Mr. or Mrs. for those not in the family; uncle or aunt for those who were, etc.; and (2) also in those days marriage didn't involve just the couple but the two families melded and became one large one. At least that was the true in this instance.

Delbert and Helen were married in 1920, on December 24, one day short of Helen's 16th birthday. The wedding took place in a church parsonage in Indianola. Their attendants were Delbert's sister, Lela, and her husband Guy Cochran. Over the years, Delbert and Helen had three children: James (Jim), who married Evelyn Dickinson of New Virginia; Margaret, who married Doyle Harris; and Guyla, whose story is told separately. She tends to apologize for how she feels she inserts herself into Helen's story. "It is just that we have lived closer than the others to Mom and Dad and they have just naturally been a part of our lives. I've 'been there' for Mother for the last 30 years."

The family's life demonstrates that happiness and the true meaning of "family'' are not dependent upon money and financial security. Delbert worked on the railroad, drove a school bus, and was a farm hand. For awhile he worked for the Beardsleys for 50¢ a day. Of course, wages in those days cannot be compared to the value of money at the present time.

Helen helped with finances by making all the children's clothes from those that would be given to the family. She took them apart and made dresses for the girls. Guyla says they always looked nice. One time when she and Margaret were in grade school, Margaret had a new coat for Easter. Guyla would "inherit" it when Margaret grew out of it but Guyla was so envious and angry that she refused to walk to church with Margaret, but walked a few steps behind. Of course, Guyla had her pretty little hat and gloves but she had to wear Margaret's old coat and didn't accept the fact gracefully.

The family always cared about their appearance. James was particularly fussy about his hair. Helen said, "I don't remember how old he was before I quit combing his hair when he was going somewhere."

Helen further supplemented the family income and, when the children were old enough, they worked, too. Guyla remembers going with her mother on wallpapering jobs. She describes how they set up two rickety ladders, placed a board across the steps between them, and, wearing the only shoes they had, with probably relatively high heels, they would climb up to put on the paper. Helen preferred the ceilings. "You don't have to cut around windows and doors for ceiling work." Guyla did the pasting. They also picked and shucked corn, using a team and wagon and being paid by the bushel-probably 50¢ a bushel. Guyla might have been in 6th or 7th grade when they did that and what she most looked forward to every day was lunch, which Helen packed to take with them.

Everything the family did, they did together. There was no money or transportation, so they enjoyed themselves at home. Guyla remembers that they ate a lot. They made lots of homemade ice cream; and every evening they had popcorn and apples while they played pitch-serious pitch. Each year Christmas was a special occasion even though there wasn't much money for presents. They always went out in the country and cut down a Christmas tree. Those were the days when lights were on a continuous circuit so that if one bulb failed, the whole string went out. What a time-consuming challenge to locate and replace that one bulb! They always went to the Christmas Eve program at church where they sang carols and had a program after which there were bags of candy. Margaret and Guyla always got a doll for which Helen made complete wardrobes and accessories-blankets, bathrobes, dresses and coats. Delbert was the "biggest kid" of all. He could hardly wait for presents to be unwrapped. On Christmas Day they went to Grandma Burt's house and she had presents for them, also.

Another big event every year was going for a week to the State Fair. They and Grace and her family camped and in those days the children were turned loose to go anywhere and do anything. No one had to worry about something happening.

One hilarious trip that Guyla described was to Wheatland, Wyoming, to visit Delbert's sister, Lela, and husband Guy. The entire family-Margaret, Jim, Guyla, Delbert, Helen and Mother and Grandpa Harsh-packed into a school bus to make the trip. Sadly, by that time Mother Harsh had suffered a stroke and they had moved into town. In order for her to make this trip, Delbert tied her rocking chair in the aisle between the rows of seat, and this is the way the family traveled for what was probably three days and two nights each way. Guyla remarked, "Pa and Ma Kettle!" They camped overnight in areas provided for travelers and cooked on what Helen called "monkey stoves"-wood burning, with four plates on the top. The adventure covered a two-week period and the memories will last forever.

In 1944, when Guyla was a sophomore in high school, the family moved to Osceola. They lived at 318 East Clay before they bought a mobile home on East 34. Delbert worked for Ray Kerns in the Sinclair station but will be remembered best for his years as custodian at the school. What pride he took in keeping the school "slick and shiny''! He worked so hard during summer vacation in order that, when the young people came back to school in the fall, the windows and floors would be clean and polished! During their time in Osceola, Helen worked for 23 years at the Snowdon garment factory, sewing facing on slips but primarily making samples which owner, David Kaminksy, showed prospective buyers. Bundles of fabric were for sale and Helen bought many of them from which she made beautiful garments for the grandchildren.

Both Jim and Doyle served a time in the Army, returned home and worked for HyVee. Jim went on to work for Swift Meat Company before going to work for Oskaloosa Food Products. He married Evelyn Dickinson of New Virginia and they had two boys, Jim and Tom. Jim had one daughter, Justine; Tom had three girls, Amy, Laurie, and Jill. Jim, Sr.'s first wife, Evelyn, who, Guyla said, was one of the best friends she ever had, died of cancer. He remarried his present wife, Betty.

Margaret and Doyle had two girls and a boy: Sue Ellen, Janene and Richard. By coincidence, as this story was being written, the June 17, 1999, issue of the Osceola Sentinel Tribune featured a story about Doyle under the title ''Doyle Harris was witness to history." There is a picture with the caption, "Doyle Harris holds a replica of a trailer that his image appears on. He is one of 14 employees selected from a seven-state region to have their photos appear on the side of Hy-Vee trailers." The story tells that in 1948, when Doyle was 22 and just back from two years of service in the Army, he began working in the Osceola Hy-Vee store. It reviews the progress of the super-market business from "its wobbly infancy to its confident adulthood." Doyle, who is now at the Waterfront Drive Hy-Vee in Iowa City, had farmed but returned from the service when his daughter was 11 months-of-age and found there were no jobs available in farming. His history with Hy-Vee began then. His success is surely due in part to the atmosphere of his home life because the story tells of how personally he relates to the customers, "with a hug, a handshake, and then quickly back to work...Managers at Hy-Vee say folks come in just to see Harris, whether or not they need to purchase anything." Supposedly he retired in 1988, but he stayed away for only four months and now works five hours a day during nine months of the year. He and Margaret spend three months in Arizona.

After both Delbert and Helen retired they did a lot of traveling. Phil and Guyla lived many places and Delbert and Helen traveled by train to visit them two times in Boston, Massachusetts; twice to Beaverton, Oregon; and many trips to Denver. Delbert found things to do every time. He mowed the lawn every three days, painted the house trim, hand-painted Terry's first car which was an old Chevrolet. He loved to be able to do these things.

Delbert developed health problems and was in Iowa City to have exploratory surgery but died in his sleep before it was performed. He was 70 years of age. He and Helen were one year short of celebrating their 50th anniversary.

The family has now become one big, extended family which Helen considers to be one of the grandest families that ever was. Her grandchildren continue to come to see her. When Phillip, Jr. was living, he used to come regularly. It wasn't surprising for him to show up at 9:00 at night with a hot fudge sundae for her. She also looks forward to the time when Guyla's son, Terry, is in town because he spends time with her when he visits his mother.

Health complications curtailed most of Helen's activities in later years. She was not able to go to church or Sunday school, although she loved to get and listen to tapes of the minister's sermons. She had to give up her participation in a pinochle club with Rayola Andrew, Ferne Moran, Ethel Tangeman and Margaret Penn. But her attitude is still so positive and she sees good wherever it is to be found and in many places and situations where most people don't find it. She laughingly said that she and Guyla have traded places now-Guyla has the role of mother and Helen, the daughter, does what Guyla tells her to do. They make a great team.